In a thousand dreams: an interview with Darlivie

Qualche settimana fa, mi sono innamorato a prima vista di Rock Paper Scissors!, un piccolo EP di quattro canzoni da un minuto o poco più. Lo ha pubblicato la label giapponese Galaxy Train ma l'autrice è indonesiana, Darlivie. Dato che su di lei non si trova praticamente nessuna informazione, ho pensato di farle direttamente una piccola intervista. 

First of all, can you tell us a little about your biography and introduce yourself to the listeners? Like, when did you start playing, what inspired you to start writing, etc? 

Darlivie is taken from my own last name, Uutiya Darlivie. I thought it had a nice ring to it, so I decided to use it for this project. I'm currently a Master's student in Art Education, with a focus on printmaking and illustration, so music was never really part of the plan. Everything started just about two years ago, when I moved to a small city called Yogyakarta in Indonesia.

Oh wow! I just realized that you've been to Indonesia! I saw your old post from 2018 with photos of Prambanan and Borobudur. It was pretty special to me, because that's where I met my partner. We spent most of our days there. I'm glad to know that you've walked around the same places that hold so many memories for me.

So, back to the answer :D In class, I found myself surrounded by people from different art disciplines like dance, theater, crafts, and yes, music too. I became involved in all kinds of creative activities, both inside and outside campus. I got closer to someone who was involved in the local music scene, and that connection brought me even closer to it. I began attending local gigs more regularly, and without even realizing it, I was learning just by being there, listening, and watching. Slowly, their energy pulled me in. Then the person I mentioned became my boyfriend :D (At that time). He plays in bands across very different genres, like an 80’s hardcore band called Italian Bed and an indie rock band named Calm Belt. We spent so much time together: watching gigs, sharing playlists, talking about music late into the night. 

That’s when I started to fall for indie rock. Through him, I discovered bands like FRITZ, Bugg, and Hazel English which is not exactly indie rock, but close enough to spark something inside me. Eventually, he encouraged me to start a solo project. He believed in my voice when I didn’t. I’ve always just written lyrics like “secret letters” that I never showed anyone but something changed. I don’t play any instruments either. But thanks to the gentle push and warm encouragement from my friends, what started as a personal archive of feelings slowly turned into this EP. I felt like I had something to say, and music became the place where those quiet things could live. But I never thought I could make something of my own :D

What inspired me to write these songs was the realization that I won’t stay in this city forever. Sooner or later, I’ll return to my hometown. But here, in this city, I grew up with kind people who supported me unconditionally and I also met someone I loved. We both knew our relationship wouldn’t last, and maybe that’s why we wanted to preserve it through music. It’s a simple reason: I will always remember him, even if we were never meant to stay together. I wrote the lyrics, and he created the music. It’s a bit sad, but that’s exactly why the songs exist to remember something beautiful that had to end. I guess it’s a quiet beginning from someone who never expected to be here.

So Darlivie your first musical project? Have you released o recorded other songs before Rock Paper Scissor?

Yes, Darlivie is truly my very first music project. Before this, I had never released anything or even had direct experience in music. I’ve always just been a quiet listener. Someone who finds comfort in listening to indie rock bands or dream pop or etc. I never imagined I’d arrive at this point. It all feels like a beautiful accident. I didn’t come from a musical background, but somehow, life led me here through love, friendships, and late night conversations that turned into songs.

I like how your bedroom pop writing mixes cheerful sounds, sometimes even fuzzy, and melancholic atmospheres. Which records or artists have inspired you the most?

Thank you! That means a lot to me. Actually, there's no big intention behind the fuzzy atmosphere in this project. At its core, the resulting sound leans more towards dream pop, but it naturally grew into something fuzzier—mostly because of the gear we had and the surroundings we were in. My partner, who plays guitar, is also a member of an indie rock band. So the pedals, the amps, the textures—all of it was already there, shaped by that scene. We just used what we had, and somehow, the fuzzy tones started to feel like warm layers that made sense in an indie pop frame. This gave the songs a kind of dreamy weight, like clouds carrying memories. A melancholic vibe... that comes from me. I write lyrics in moments that feel alive. So when I sing them, or when we create a melody together, it's like revisiting something I've experienced. The sadness, the sweetness and it's not forced, it just happens.

After all, we only work with what we have: our tools, our emotions and our experiences. Everything comes naturally, shaped by who we are and what we know. That's why this song sounds the way it does. 

Some artists that really inspire me and also become references for my songs are: Grrrl Gang, Zzuf, and Crayon Cats from the local scene. They each have a unique energy that I really connect with. For international artists, I would say Fazerdaze and Tony Molina. But, one of the artists that inspires me the most is FRITZ, a band from Australia. There's something very honest and raw in their sound that I really connect with. My favorite song from them is Arrow from the Pastel album. It captures a bittersweet feeling of longing and letting go, which really suits me. I guess I'm drawn to music that feels like a daydream with ghosts in it, something soft yet painful at the same time. That's the kinda feeling I hope to capture, in my own way.

Your lyrics feel deeply personal. You manage to talk about romantic moments without too much romanticism, with a simple and sincere point of view. Can you tell us something more about the stories behind your songs?

Of course, we'd be really happy to share this story with you. So, two years ago, I met someone. At first, I didn't expect more than just being friends. But slowly, feelings started to bloom and eventually, we became a couple. But from the very beginning, there was an unspoken understanding between us: that this relationship might not be something we could fight for in the long run. We accepted that "forever" the kind of future most couples hope for—was unlikely for us.

In Indonesia, cultural expectations still run deep. And sometimes, they shape the way people—especially how parents see the world and relationships (I won't say everybody, but there are still some). Sadly, we are one of those affected. Quite frankly, if we pushed our relationship to keep going, we likely wouldn't receive the blessing of our families. So, we chose to love each other in the present: supporting each other, growing together, helping, and learning. We naturally became each other’s emotional support, we talked through a lot of things and always tried to be there for one another. A kind of tender and caring relationship yet grounded in reality.

Of course, there is always a deep longing to have each other completely. But we tried not to be selfish. After spending more than two years together making a life habit together, we decided that choosing to be “just friends with lots of memories” was the best possible ending for both of us. 

The first song I wrote on the EP is Your Birthday. That day is carved into my memory not only because it’s about his birthday, but because it’s the same day he confessed he had fallen in love with me. But along with that confession came fear. Fear that being with him would hurt, and yet not being with him would hurt just the same.

And maybe you’re wondering, why the title Rock Paper Scissors? It might sound unrelated to the lyrics, but there’s a sweet little reason behind it. We always used to play rock-paper-scissors to make small decisions: where to grab coffee, what to have for dinner, who should do the laundry that day. It was silly, really. But those little games have become some of my most precious memories. Just so you know, after we decided to go back to being “friends,” I wasn’t sure I’d be okay. My feelings were still there, and I kept catching myself wondering… did he still feel the same?

I'm in love with the Indonesian indie pop scene, for the little I know about it, and I continue to be amazed by how many labels dedicated to this genre there are, and how many records are released every week. I guess that the audience involved numerically is a small niche, but yet the movement seems very active and lively! Can you tell me how you explain this "success" and how you experience this scene? Is this something that influenced your art, both lyrically and sonically?

I think one of the reasons why Indonesia's indie pop scene is still alive even though the numbers of the audience are relatively small—is the strong DIY attitude that still thrives here. Many people in the scene come from hardcore punk backgrounds, where there is a deep, rooted appreciation for underground music and a culture of supporting each other no matter what. So even when they move beyond hardcore, they often find a comfortable place in indie pop or indie rock. In my experience, especially in Yogyakarta and other parts of Indonesia, many indie rock fans actually come from the hardcore scene. Of course, not everyone has the same background. Many listeners just enjoy good pop music without being part of a subculture.

However, I think what makes this scene “success” in its own way is that it's not driven by numbers or commercial goals. People here are used to making music without high expectations, just because they love doing it. And that sincerity, I think, is what keeps the spirit of this scene alive. Actually, this is also something I've personally experienced. My partner comes from a hardcore band background, and many of our musician friends in this city share the same common roots. The DIY spirit is very much alive here—not just in the way people make music, but also in how friendships are built around it.

When we started this project, our goal wasn't to pursue an audience or recognition. It was more of a personal archive, a way to document a moment in our lives and the supportive friendship that sparked it. I had no experience at all in making music, so I never imagined my songs would be heard in your country. It still feels unreal to me.

But maybe that's what makes the indie pop or indie rock scene here feel so genuine, many of us make songs not because we have to, but because we feel honest and necessary.

If you could collaborate with any artist, local or international, who would it be and why?

If I could choose anyone to collaborate with, I would love to work with Grrrl Gang for local artists. They are one of the most active indie rock bands in Indonesia, and I really admire their consistency and passion for music. I've been following their journey for quite some time, and the way they continue to work and grow really inspires me.

For an international artist, I would definitely choose FRITZ. I remember the first time I heard their music, it really touched me and made me think, “I want to do this too.” They has been a huge influence on me, both sonically and emotionally. I'm honestly a little obsessed with their work (in the truest sense!).